It is investing heavily in African football and supplies kit to eight African football associations The next World Cup will be held in South Africa in 2010. Payback time? The Puma people flash quietly confident smiles. The company’s long-term aim is to become the “most desirable sports-lifestyle company on the market”.High above Herzogenaurach, a young woman is heaving large bags of purchases out of the Adidas factory outlet “I don’t know what the fuss is about,” she says. But Puma has already moved on, taking the competition out of Herzogenaurach, out of Germany and out of Europe to a different continent.

The last World Cup final was watched by a billion people and a similarly huge audience is expected when this year’s tournament concludes in Berlin in July.Perhaps Germany will win and Adidas will claim victory. “We might be only kitting out six teams, but as you can see, they are the teams with the best chances.” The company is also sponsoring Argentina, France, Japan, Spain, and Trinidad and Tobago Yet Puma may yet have the last laugh. “Adidas has long been the world market leader in football,” said a spokeswoman, Kristin Koopmann, with more than a hint of Schadenfreude. “I doubt the two companies would ever be able to agree on a common history,” he sighs.Fifa says the World Cup is “arguably the biggest media event on the planet” and Adidas clearly wants to win. It worked so well that they went and turned up at Adidas the next month wearing Puma.”It’s just a pity, says Ernst Dittrich, that Herzogenaurach will probably never get a much-wished for joint shoe museum. Investors at Adidas have raised concerns about the company’s future, after its recent acquisition of Reebok.Back in Herzogenaurach, the locals certainly know how to exploit the battle of the brands.

“Some painters who were commissioned to paint the outside of the Puma building rolled up to put up the scaffolding all wearing Adidas shoes,” recalls Ernst Dittrich, the town archivist. “Within minutes, the boss had them all inside and gave them the latest Puma trainers to put on instead. The Adidas stripes may be adorning the official World Cup balls, and Adidas is an official Fifa partner, but Puma’s shares have rocketed, with sales expected to top €2.3bn (£1.6bn) this year due to an increase in the purchase of soccer goods.Puma is the smaller company, with about 4,000 employees worldwide compared with Adidas’s 17,000, and its sales fall far short of those of its competitor, but Puma’s profit margins are better. er, like one of George Bush’s grandsons working for Saddam Hussein.”Puma has certainly scored points against Adidas in Germany’s World Cup year. “Something like that, even a few years back, would have unimaginable It would have been like … “One of Rudi Dassler’s grandsons now works as a legal consultant for Adidas,” says Trulsson.

Secrets are no longer swapped at the bus stop by the unfaithful, but designers who move between Puma and Adidas are all forced to take extended leave before starting their new jobs, to prevent them taking corporate secrets with them.At managerial levels, the atmosphere has also relaxed. His friend, who is kicking a bench, has got a pair of Adidas on, and the third, clearly a town rebel, wears Nike. “Go on,” he taunted Rudi’s son, Armin Dassler, who was the Puma chief “Take on Boris. That’ll really make your cousin mad.” It was all Armin needed to hear to sign the then unknown Becker under a £100,000 advertising contract.In the Cafe Rommelt, a group hunched over their beers are all wearing Adidas; workers at both firms enjoy large discounts on the newest gear, and most of Herzogenaurach’s 25,000 burghers amble among the ancient wood-beamed houses and cobbled streets in tracksuits.But the younger generation hanging around the pedestrian precinct don’t appear to choose their friends according to the shoes they wear any more One teenager, licking an ice-cream, wears Puma.

Mr Hu spent more of his time with American business leaders than with George Bush and his Washington colleagues. When it comes to economic policy, countries sometimes cannot agree on the right approach: they protect their own at the expense of the greater good.It was probably asking too much to see anything of great significance emerge from President Hu Jintao’s trip to Washington last week. And divided loyalties make it difficult at times to reach the right decision. Globalisation has changed the ways in which we think about the beautiful game: clubs these days have to attract the world’s best players, not just the best players from a single country. Most of us have few problems with this idea.In other spheres of life, we have difficulty with globalisation.

On 20 June, when England play Sweden, most fans will be hoping John Terry makes the smart tackle to prevent Freddie Ljungberg from breaching the English defences: Arsenal fans will be supporting the Chelsea player at the Arsenal star’s expense.We all have these divided loyalties. We don’t mind that the players at our favourite club aren’t English: what matters is that the club wins. It may be that the playing field is not always as level as it might be – there aren’t enough Roman Abramoviches to go around – but few Arsenal fans are likely to be disappointed should Ars? Wenger’s men lift the Champions’ League trophy.Those Arsenal fans who also happen to be English – the vast majority, I assume – will soon find themselves with divided loyalties. An embarrasse de riches indeed: French players, French-speaking players, a few other non-English nationalities and a French manager. Judged by playing staff alone, Real Madrid, with David Beckham and Jonathan Woodgate, is more English than Arsenal.
Soccer teams these days are the living embodiment of globalisation. So who would he choose from Arsenal’s stars? If he was at last week’s match, Sven could think about Henry, Flamini or Pires (French), Toure or Eboue (Ivorian), Bergkamp or Van Persie (Dutch), Senderos (Swiss), Silva (Brazilian), Fabregas (Spanish), Ljungberg (Swedish), Hleb (Belorussian) or Lehmann (German). Sven-G? Eriksson must be licking his lips: with all this English success, he has an embarrasse de riches from which to select his team for this summer’s World Cup.

Should the Gunners prevail against Villareal tomorrow, we can celebrate the renaissance of English football. An English team winning the Champions’ League last year, potential finalists – and possible winners – this year: it sounds marvellous. Arsenal have one foot in the Champions’ League final. Other nations that may also qualify include Malaysia, Thailand and Singapore, which will host the annual meetings in September where Mr de Rato said he would publish “concrete proposals”.This could be the most significant change to the IMF since 1971, when the Bretton Woods agreement that obliged countries to fix their exchange rates to gold was abandoned.Observers noted last week marked the 60th anniversary of the death of John Maynard Keynes, the British economist seen as the architect of Bretton Woods.. “Chinese economic reform always follows the philosophy of gradualism (but) probably it can be a little bit faster.”Meanwhile, Mr de Rato said the IMFC had given him a clear mandate to propose changes to the voting shares of some countries, including some emerging market economies, by September. His proposal would give ad hoc increases to a small number of countries like China, South Korea and Mexico.

The men, aged 40 and 25, were arrested under the Terrorism Act 2000 at an address in Alva, Clackmannanshire.
Shopkeeper’s son Mohammed Siddique, 20, was arrested in the same town on Thursday April 13, as part of the same investigation. Two men were arrested today as part of an on-going terrorism investigation, police said. While his Lexus GS 450 is a sign of his ecological sensitivity, it is not as green as it might be, according to critics.. David Cameron’s newly trumpeted “green” credentials came under fire yesterday on the eve of a speech committing his party to cutting pollution

At issue is the Tory leader’s choice of car. Tony Blair attacked critics yesterday, dismissing the former law lord Lord Steyn as “out of touch” with modern Britain and saying that there would be no let-up in the hardline approach to crime suspects..

You might not think, then, that many MBA programmes would waste much time studying the working practices of public sector or charitable bodies, given the absence of profit in those organisations’ DNA.. The Government has been forced on to the offensive over its record on civil liberties. Catch most MBA graduates off-guard and they’ll admit, perhaps bluntly, that chief among their reasons for getting the qualification was to increase their earning power. And most business schools, too, will happily point applicants to statistics illustrating just how much past graduates have increased their income by acquiring those three letters after their name. “If we experience an economic downturn or falling stock markets, a financial company such as Standard Life could suffer the most,” Mr Modray says.Anna Bowes from IFA Chase de Vere urges people not to make a “knee-jerk reaction” on the basis that the insurer will definitely demutualise: “There is still no guarantee this will happen – it’s a case of wait and see.” But should the float go ahead, she says: “If you don’t have a lot of money, you may be better off selling the shares and putting the money into a more appropriate investment [such as a unit trust fundor savings account].”The appeal for investors in mutuals such as Standard Life has long been that financial rewards go directly to the customer as the company is working for them and not the shareholders.”This should avoid a corporate ‘fat cat’ culture and encourage management to make sensible long-term decisions rather than short-sighted ones simply to appease shareholders,” says Mr Modray.However, in the case of Standard Life, its need to expand as a player in the UK market appears to be outweighing these advantages.. Some members may also simply want to cash in their shares, Mr Modray adds, if they don’t believe in the insurer’s prospects.With more competition in the protection (critical illness, income protection and life cover) industry from supermarkets – as well as new arrivals in the pensions industry – there are concerns over how life companies will fare in the future. Each eligible with-profits policyholder – anyone who invested before 31 March 2004 – will receive a fixed allocation for their loss of membership of 185 shares, expected to be worth between 240p and 290p each.

Most will also get a variable allocation of shares – based on how long they’ve had their policy and its size.Half of these policyholders could get windfalls of between £500 and £1,000, it is estimated that, while the rest could be on course for more than £1,000 worth of shares – although all depends on the share price when Standard Life floats.If you are one of the many recipients of the shares, you may be at a loss whether to cash them in immediately or retain them and hope they prove a decent long-term investment.For its part, Standard Life is trying to encourage former members to hold on to the shares by offering a loyalty bonus of one free share for every 20 held during a 12-month period from the date of flotation.Other carrots are being dangled: in the event of a “yes” vote, Standard Life will write to all its customers – including those not entitled to windfalls – and offer more shares at a discounted rate.But investment specialists say the decision facing potential shareholders is not an easy one.”If Standard Life does perform well as a business in the future, then shareholders should benefit via healthy dividends and a rising share price,” says Justin Modray from independent financial adviser (IFA) Bestinvest.”The company is reasonably diverse, with a prominent presence in the insurance, investment management, pension and banking markets – this helps reduce risk.”But owning shares in an individual company can itself be a high-risk strategy compared with investing in funds that put your money into a basket of shares, he warns.What you choose to do with any shares you receive will depend largely on your financial health, other investments and how much debt you have, as well as on your age and your financial goals. With momentum behind the proposed float, the question of what to do with their shares in the new public company will likely become a pressing issue for millions.Standard Life released more details last Tuesday of what it plans to do after going public. These are the people – holding investment bonds, endowments or pensions – who bear the risks and rewards of the group.If Standard Life demutualises – and to do so, it needs 75 per cent of policyholders to back it – they will surrender their rights as owners and be offered shares in the company instead.The City and most industry specialists argue that Standard Life has no option other than to demutualise, since staying as a mutual limits its capacity to raise money for expansion The Board hopes that most of its members will agree. (Other policyholders got literature explaining what is happening.)At present, Standard Life is a mutual company owned by its with-profits policy investors (or member customers).

Standard Life’s plans to abandon its status as a mutual insurer and float on the London Stock Exchange prompted a mass mailshot – one of the Royal Mail’s biggest – to more than four million members and policyholders last week.
With each pack weighing nearly a third of a kilogram, the nation’s army of posties would have good reason for groaning.Standard Life policyholders might also have been forgiven their own groans at the sight of all that paperwork. But they at least have hope of a reward – in the shape of a shares windfall of £500 to £1,000 or more.The company has sent ballot papers to 2.4 million eligible members to try to gain their support for its demutualisation. If the answer is “no”, the company must return to the drawing board, and probably face renewed takever interest.. Pity the postmen. Alternatively, they can attend a special general meeting in Edinburgh on 31 May.What happens next?If a “yes” vote is achieved, the insurer will list on the London Stock Exchange in July. In 2000, an Australian fund manager, Fred Woollard, tried to force it to become a listed company but management argued that members would be better off as they were.His failed attempt was backed by only 46 per cent of members – short of the 75 per cent needed.At that point, its value was estimated at up to £18bn – and policyholders stood to gain a windfall significantly higher than the one they will get today.What changed?Between 2000 and 2003, the stock market slumped and wiped out much of Standard Life’s reserves.The problem was compounded when the City watchdog, the Financial Services Authority (FSA), introduced a new “realistic” accounting regime that triggered a huge share sell-off, further weakening its position.Standard Life has since toiled to meet the new financial requirements and find new money to back any substantial growth in new business.When’s the vote?Standard Life began mailing voting packs last Tuesday and all members and policyholders will receive one by the end of the month.Those members who are eligible to vote can do so by filling out their forms and sending them back by 28 May. Here’s why:Has Standard Life always backed demutualisation?No.

The French, whose caf?are disappearing (some sources claim up to 75 per cent have closed down since the Sixties, driven out by McDonald’s, television and le stress) restrict themselves to a noncommittal grimace.Americans don’t so much preserve their past as reconstruct it without too much concern for historical accuracy, or even for whether the past they are preserving is actually their own. whatever it is, if it has outlived its usefulness, two or three will be gathered together in its name, drawing up the articles of association to preserve it.Other nations do not do this. And diesel engines, too, even though they aren’t in the past yet, which you could also say of computers and software and old computer games: are they in the past? Really?
They are. Look up “computer preservation society” on Google and you get 11 million hits. Given the nature of Google (how curious that you get no little advertisements when you google “organ preservation”; you’d have thought that would be a goldmine for the big-schlong-and-Viagra crowd) that 11 million doesn’t tell us much, except that there’s a sizeable crowd of obsessives out there, spending their weekends munching beetroot sandwiches and talking fondly of the golden age of computing.Or of cinema organs, church organs, fairground organs, barrel organs; of public clocks, The Goon Show, television programmes in general, old films, railways, the Trident, the Humber Keel and Sloop, the great British Breakfast, Waltham Windmill, windmills in general… Here we turn around, going with the current, hell-for-leather towards a golden, wonderful past filled with milestones and hedgehogs, greasy spoon caf?and lighthouses, beer and sandwiches, tall ships and glossy, panting steam locomotives smelling of salt and tar, and of hot brass and coal-smoke respectively.

It is a curiously British obsession Not for us the helpless romanticism of Scott Fitzgerald. “So we beat on,” he wrote at the end of The Great Gatsby, “boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.” There’s Americans for you, noses pointing towards the future, paddling like hell towards the shining future, innovation, modernity

It’s different over here. One in 10 women employed a cleaner, but six out of 10 women “still cleaned up before she or he arrives”.. But many were aware of the pressures exerted by media images of women as perfectionist home-makers such as the characters of the American television series Desperate Housewives.Nearly half of those interviewed (46 per cent) described themselves as “cleanaholics”, while 46 per cent wished they could “cut down on cleaning”.Eight out of 10 respondents compared the cleanliness of their home with other people’s, while 70 per cent feared they would be thought “lazy” if their homes were untidy.Dee Smith, executive producer of the channel’s Cleanaholics series, believed that “cleaning was the new therapy”.”British women feel happier and more in control of their lives when their home is clean and tidy – and judging by their high-powered cleaning habits there are more desperate housewives on this side of the Atlantic than the other,” she said.The respondents spent an average of £9.70 each week on household cleaning products. Nearly six out of 10 (58 per cent) defended their role in the home and said they “felt depressed if their house was a mess”, while 59 per cent said “untidiness and clutter made them feel tense”.Only a tiny minority of 4 per cent admitted to being averse to cleaning the home, saying that it was “a waste of time and effort”.The survey of 2,000 women found that cleaning chores featured higher on the average list of priorities than personal grooming – a woman spent two hours and 23 minutes cleaning and tidying, while only 52 minutes on personal appearance.In spite of the feelgood factor around housework, 57 per cent of women admitted that cleaning exhausted them, particularly as 71 per cent also had a job.One-third of all women claimed “cleaning gives them more satisfaction than sex”.Although only 22 per cent said they actively enjoyed cleaning and tidying, the majority (64 per cent) said the “results made them happy” and half said it was “visually joyful” which left them feeling “proud of their achievements”.

But 59 per cent of the women interviewed would have it no other way and said “cleaning makes them feel in control of their lives”, while 60 per cent said they found it “mentally therapeutic”.Where 20 years ago housework was seen by many as a sign of female subjugation, the tide appears to have turned. In an age when women are making economic strides and excelling in the workplace, the one thing that gives the majority a sense of empowerment is a good go around the house with the vacuum cleaner – followed by some cleaning and dusting.
The online study, commissioned by the Discovery Home and Health TV website, found that the average woman between 18 and 80 spent nine years, two months and 25 days of her adult waking life cleaning and tidying. There was a time when the modern woman insisted her partner did 50 per cent of the housework – or iron his own shirts at least. But the postmodern female has more than made peace with doing the domestic chores, and has embraced housework as “mentally therapeutic”, according to a survey. Under grey skies and an almost constant drizzle, some 40,000 people showed yesterday that there are many ways to complete the London Marathon.. One was dressed in a suit of armour and dragging an 8ft-tall dragon Two paused half-way round to get married. And another wheeled his way around the 26.2 mile course quicker than anyone in history.

Extensive use of natural light will dilute what Mr Douglas described as the “horrid subterranean experience” of most airports and allow clear views of the runways. “So many airports put all sorts of bells and whistles in place but they forget the basics,” he said.The new terminal, designed by the Richard Rogers partnership, will dramatically alter the perception of visitors to Britain, who may ordinarily be forgiven for thinking that, upon arrival at Heathrow, they have landed in an airport designed by, and for, Dawn Man. “We’re not a registered charity,” Tony Douglas, T5’s managing director, points out. “While we want a huge tick in the box that says ‘public service provider’, we’re also a private commercial business, not a philanthropic one.”The main building is more than 400 metres long, while the satellite terminals, T5b and T5c (the former will open in 2008, the latter in 2011), are each as big as Terminal 4.

T5’s station will have two platforms for the Piccadilly Line, two for the Heathrow Express and a further two that may in the future link into the national rail network.A defining feature of the new terminal is the single-span 176m roof (the largest single-span structure in the UK) and a pedestrian concourse that links the coach and train stations and car park to the building. The terminal will house around 140 shops covering 22,000sq m, which will provide 50 per cent of BAA’s profits as it seeks to claw back its investment. It employs 6,500 construction workers and has used 80,000 tonnes of steel.The public will have access to four levels of the new terminal, while baggage conveyors will run underground for more than 17km. With a floor space of 260 hectares, T5 is about the same size as Hyde Park or 50 football pitches. The project, which is costing BAA £4.2bn, is one of the largest construction projects in European history (though it has not always been a happy one – BAA has faced strikes and protests over bonuses and compensation for the time it takes to reach the site). Since then, BAA, which owns Heathrow, has wasted little time.

This is a good one for kids, with exhibitions such as “Under the Mud” allowing gooey glimpses of submerged creatures.Those with an eye for detail will appreciate the rich insect life at Wicken Fen, the National Trust’s oldest English reserve. Now is a good time to visit the Montrose Basin, covering a vast estuary of the South Esk and attracting more than 50,000 migratory birds. The interactive wildlife centre includes high-powered telescopes and CCTV cameras allowing close-ups of the huge numbers of pink-footed geese and knots. Inland you’ll find red deer, but most appealing are the raptors – this is one of the best places in the UK to see golden and sea eagles.Marsh regions are another wildlife hotspot, where the mix of landscapes attracts a rich variety of smaller animals.

Around 130 dolphins live in the area year-round, but late spring and summer are the best viewing times, when boats traverse the waters looking also for tiny harbour porpoises, grey seals and nesting sea birds.Another good spot for dolphins is the Isle of Mull, off the west coast of Scotland, which has a great combination of coastal and inland wildlife. Boat trips offer views of bottlenose dolphins, minke whales, European otters and birds, including puffins, crossbills and huge numbers of waders during the spring migration. A range of boat trips take visitors on tours around the islands.Cardigan Bay, on the west coast of Wales, has one of the UK’s only resident populations of bottlenose dolphins, and was the first area to be designated as a Marine Heritage Coast. The Outer Farnes are home to more than 4,000 grey seals, making this one of the most important seal-breeding colonies in Britain.

Tens of thousands of birds nest here in spring, including huge colonies of sea birds such as puffins, guillemots and razorbills, as well as dive-bombing terns and cormorants. The caves peppering the coastline are home to bats during spring. Walk from the visitors’ centre at Rhossili to Rhossili Down Commons for fantastic views of Worm’s Head.For some of the finest birdwatching in England, head two miles off the Northumberland coast to a cluster of islands known as the Farnes. The wide variety of habitats – cliffs, sand dunes, marshes and woodland – attract a huge range of animals, including rare dune-dwelling insects, otters and badgers. But the highlight is the birdlife, particularly around Worm’s Head. The reserve, covering 59 hectares of woodland, is best known for its peregrine falcons. The birds are due to return to the reserve around now, and can be either glimpsed from the ground or spied on from the live CCTV link-up at the visitors’ centre.

Other common species include badgers and bats: there are guided walks to see both throughout the spring and summer.Part pine forest, part shoreline, Formby Reserve, 15 miles north of Liverpool, is home to one of Britain’s last thriving colonies of red squirrels. A buffer zone prevents grey squirrels from interbreeding with the reds, and visitors can wander through the trees on a network of paths, getting glimpses of the squirrels scurrying around the trees.Our coastlines provide some of the richest wildlife habitats in the country, and the Gower Peninsula in Wales was the first area in the UK to be designated as an Area of Outstanding Natural Beauty, 50 years ago this May. A wide range of walking routes can be followed through the estate, and guided wildlife walks are offered in summer.More demure but no less interesting is the recently refurbished visitor centre at the Falls of Clyde Wildlife Reserve, close to New Lanark. Recognised as one of the most important conservation areas in the UK, this is home to huge populations of deer, plus healthy numbers of pine martens, red and black grouse, red squirrels and elusive golden eagles. Mar Lodge Estate, a 29,380-hectare wedge of the Cairngorms National Park, is an excellent mix of forest and moorland. Special events include bat walks and dawn choruses, as well as talks at the Reptile Centre in Lyndhurst, which run until the end of September.Scotland has some of our richest swathes of forest.

That is, of course, unless their north London neighbours win the European Cup against Barcelona – one of Davids’ former clubs – later this month.But that’s for the future “That’s a whole different matter,” Davids says “The first thing is we have to do what we have to do And that’s win. You look at what you are trying to accomplish and you can finally have a positive result. If you are hoping for a Champions’ League final or winning a title it’s the same You are working for a result,” Davids explains. “It’s as important as any other important match I’ve played in,” says the 33-year-old veteran of four Champions’ League finals and a World Cup semi-final.”That’s because it’s what we have worked for all season. It is a duty Davids has enthusiastically discharged.And so when Spurs face West Ham United today, Davids will be able to say, in all honesty, that he adds Upton Park 2006 to Vienna 1995, Marseille 1998 and – most recently – Old Trafford 2003 as one of the biggest matches of his career. Add a “winning mentality and physical presence” to his team but, also, set the example and provide the guidance to the young players.

It’s Friday afternoon, and Davids steps off the sun-bathed training ground and swings his arm around an academy player Words of advice are offered The boy’s face lights up He appears to walk six inches taller. “And there is no ‘I’ in ‘we’.”

But then this is a more at-ease version of the old battle-hardened “Pitbull” who spoiled for a fight and fought his corner. “We work as a team,” he says of the effect he has had on Tottenham Hotspur’s burgeoning young squad. Edgar Davids makes the kind of statement that – given his competitive rage and his singular reputation for involving himself in a variety of confrontations throughout his intense career – may raise a few eyebrows in Amsterdam, Lombardy and Turin. I’ve got 40 caps and I’ve only played in my strongest position [attacking midfield] for England for 45 minutes.” The Liverpool captain has often been asked to occupy a more defensive role, to accommodate Frank Lampard, and recognises his versatility may have worked against him. Rooney’s absence, though, could give him the chance to play upfield, behind Michael Owen (if fit) or Peter Crouch..

Gerrard, who missed the last World Cup because of injury, said: “I was thinking about it the other day. Sven Goran Eriksson has two friendlies, a B international and 34 days to plot a solution for the probable loss to his World Cup plans of Wayne Rooney. But the message of England’s Steven Gerrard is: “Play me to my strengths and let me at the opposition.”

Gerrard was as downhearted as anyone by the metatarsal fracture suffered by his fellow Merseysider, but he will know that Rooney’s misfortune has also opened up opportunities for Eriksson to restructure his attacking forces. Suggestions from those who watched Dan Smith’s ankle-breaking tackle on Abou Diaby in the Sunderland v Arsenal game last Tuesday, a match officiated by Mr Gallagher, that he has retired because he has lost his red card are malicious and ill-founded We’ll hear no more of that, please.Simon Redfern. BSkyB snaffled four of the six available packages for 2007-10 and the other two went to Setanta, the Irish satellite channel.

You don’t want a tap on the shoulder and a ‘thanks mate, your time’s up’. He reckoned that the idea of taking 1,000 Test wickets – he has 684 – was far-fetched “I am 36, my kids are about to turn nine, seven and five You obviously start to think about retiring. You got through the new ball and the medium-pacers came on and we made that many runs and were that far ahead that it was just a matter of how many days it would take.”On the subject of his own future Warne was barely less effusive. Then it got to a stage where all the fast bowlers retired and there were none. “They were two evenly matched sides last year but England’s bowling was very, very good.

Flintoff, Harmison and Jones all bowled above 90mph, swinging the ball normally and reverse-swinging it, as well as nipping the ball around.”The last time I faced that was in the early Nineties, probably from Pakistan or West Indies. “Sometimes you have to lose to become better,” he said matter-of-factly “I’m not sure England are used to being favourites It demands a different mindset They are going to Australia to retain the Ashes. Australia have lost once at home in 14 years I think, and if England lose they then have to wait another couple of years, and who knows who will be around then?”But Warne is not one for merely indulging in the propaganda and psychological gamesmanship of some of his compatriots He recognises good cricket and good cricketers. England, he said by his estimation for the four millionth time, deserved to win last summer.But things were different now Australia had reassessed themselves. “I want to groom these guys, give them ideas about how to enjoy it.”A crammed season in England will not permit much time for planning, but he is cute enough to know that the subject of the Ashes is unavoidable. He is proud of the team he has moulded at the Rose Bowl – in his image in more ways than one, to judge by the peroxide rinses.

This bamboo, Tonkin cane, comes from one very small area of China, and is getting increasingly hard to source Barder’s stock includes cane from 50, 60 years ago. It tapers to a wand-like delicacy, yet is pregnant with power and resilience.” Wow! And you thought we were talking about fishing rods.There is no real reason to fish with cane It’s yesterday’s material Carbon fibre is lighter, more powerful, more forgiving But it’s soulless. He says: “More beautiful than anything in the Uffizi or the Louvre. What’s the secret?My only encounter with Barder’s work has been waggling one in a vaguely fishy way at a tackle fair, so perhaps I should quote my writer friend Tom Fort. We’re talking seriously retro, the sort of stuff your great-grandfather might have fished with But people wait up to two years to own one of his creations. I suspect my wife would bobbitt me if I bought even the cheapest in Barder’s range, a Mark IV carp rod for a mere £1,000 His work is not even modern. So why would anyone want to fork out £1,700 for an Edward Barder?
Let me say that I have no vested interest I don’t own one; probably never will.

Last week, I received an email from a pile-’em-high tackle show, advertising rods for £4.99. That rod will be 20 times lighter, better, more adaptable and more durable than my pride of the Grand Union Canal These days, you can get a quite superb rod for £100. My first fishing rod cost 10s 6d (52.5p in today’s money) It was made of cane and wasn’t very good It died, eventually, of misuse. He has always believed he is better than any horse or any person around him, and doesn’t see why he can’t do what he wants when he wants He’s an alpha male, and a serious one.”. “The trouble is,” he said, “he thinks he’s God, so we have to treat him like that. His main role in preparing George Washington for his day of days has been as psychologist. For the colt’s trainer, Aidan O’Brien, the road to Guineas glory has been as convoluted behind the scenes as it was straightforward on the track.

And at no time has there been any sparkle, sizzle or sense of spontaneity on any plate or face.Beauberry House feels like an empty, beautiful, soulless shell, set up by people who obviously love planning, setting up and creating restaurants. It’s a great cellar, but nobody can find the wine that I want. The menu grabs the eye, but turns out to be amateurish fusion food. But it is such a major disaster area of floppy bits of liver on top of a very large sheath of claggy eel skin lined with plugs of fat, sitting on a thick fillet of soft-fleshed eel on a messy stir-fry of baby sweetcorn and mushrooms in a very sweet sauce, I honestly lose my appetite.For dessert, pain perdu with tilleul (lime flower) ice cream (£6.50) is a generous serving of stodgy French toast, with colourful, sweet berries and a smooth, but fast-melting, ice cream.What is the matter with this place? It’s all very well setting up a highly detailed designer space in a marvellous heritage building, but there are cigarette butts strewn around the front door. I love eel, and tried to reward the chef for putting together “eel roasted with sake, steamed with konbu and glazed with foie gras” (£15.50). And God I hate it when you are ignored for so long you have to pick up your own bottle of wine, only to be pounced upon by a waiter flapping like a headless chook.

Either do your job, or bugger off and let me do it.A structured main course of a plug of rare, round Charolais beef (£19.50) served with a beaker of sancho pepper sauce and a kindling pile of fat, soft “sumo” chips is fair but dull And I won’t say much about the eel dish if you don’t mind. After 20 minutes, a second waiter comes to explain that it could not be found. I fear they have lost the first waiter, too, but he finally emerges with my second choice – again out of curiosity – a fruity Riserva 2001 pinot noir (£34) from the award-winning St Michael-Eppan vineyard in the South Tyrol.And so the night drags on The staff have the disconnected air of catering casuals. They are probably perfectly adept at serving canap?and drinks for 200. It’s just the single plates they can’t bring to the table with any confidence. When I order a rarely exported Luxembourg Pinot Noir out of curiosity, the waiter looks blank and asks me for its code number.

Or perhaps the table is a long way from the kitchen, as a lightly spicy, creamy spider crab soup with red curry coconut milk (£6.50), cutely presented in a crab shell on a tear-drop plate, is barely warm.Head sommelier Jean-Sebastien Azais has put together a vast and impressive global-spanning wine list, but in his absence, nobody seems to know much about it. Nori-wrapped tuna spring rolls (£9.50) are done in the modern Jean-Georges Vongerichten style, but are served at blood temperature, the tuna itself being unattractively dark instead of pink and glistening. Dishes such as spicy octopus salad with yuzu dressing; roast black cod with black bean sauce; and seared scallops, leeks and tomatoes with lemongrass cappuccino are intriguing.But the journey from menu to table can be a rocky one, no matter how smooth your resin floor. The floor is glossy orange resin, the chairs are fluorescent orange flock, the banquettes are zoomy white leather, and the chandelier is a white branch of a light installation glittering with tiny pin-pricks of light.This is balanced on the other side of the house by a charcoal grey bar with a 2am licence that is dimly dramatic thanks to its mood lighting, stainless-steel bar, red flock chairs and glamorous scarlet chaise longues.There are just as many modern exclamation marks in the bravely Japanese-French menu put together by executive chef Tauvron and chef Kunal Baynath.

There are more on the steps.
After a fumbled coat-check, we are led into a deliciously modern room that feels oddly like a nightclub seen by day. And as I step out of the car at the door, what do I tread on? A cigarette butt. There are the gates, the garden, the impressive grade-II listed building, the lobby, the bar, the restaurant, the al fresco terrace – so much to worry about and maintain for a smooth, harmonious whole. He knows it’s the hundreds of little things that make one big thing: a highly polished, well-run restaurant. I can only imagine the list would grow into the hundreds if he ever got his hands on Beauberry House, the part-restaurant, part-function venue that is the latest project from L’Etranger owners Ibi Issolah and Jerome Tauvron, in Dulwich’s Belair Park. It includes washing window sills, cleaning outside steps, checking flashlight batteries, ensuring tables don’t wobble, and seeing that the base of the tree outside the restaurant is clear of matches and cigarette butts. If they did want to recreate a role at the top, they should have started there – not in the middle..